The state of Maine and the city of San Francisco are considering requiring warning labels for cell phones.
Perhaps some warning labels are in order. After all, few things are more annoying than people SPEAKING AS LOUDLY AS POSSIBLE INTO THEIR PHONE ABOUT WHAT’S FOR DINNER when a normal tone of voice will do.
But these warning labels have nothing to do with letting people know that their phones can make them look like jackasses.
No, the labels warn the credulous that their phones emit electromagnetic radiation. Otherwise known as light waves. Some people believe that this causes brain cancer.
Brain atrophy, maybe. But cancer? Most studies have found no correlation, let alone causation.
Something else to consider: the demographic group far and away most prone to brain cancer is also far and away the least likely to use cell phones – the elderly.
Hmm.
Inertia Wins! 
